Graphic Novel - Kristofer Straub - Starslip Crisis Volume 1 (2007)

I bought this book from the man himself at the last PAX Prime, and I was able to get a drawing and an autograph in it as well. I have been trying to read this particular comic of his online for a long time, but I couldn't get into it. Not because it's bad or anything. But because there occasionally happens to be a lot of text, and that's difficult to parse when you just want to read some webcomics.

In book form, however, it's just fine.

Starslip Crisis is a webcomic by the great Kris Straub, lately of Chainsawsuit and Broodhollow fame, that ran for several years. Now that it has ended, I felt like it was time to really dig in, but I had the aforementioned problem. Because while some of the premises of this hard sci-fi comic can be a bit ridiculous, make no mistake, it is hard sci-fi.

Starslip is about a decommissioned warship that has been converted into a high-class art museum, curated by professional artsy douche Memnon Vanderbeam, piloted by ex-space-pirate Cutter Edgewise, and janitorially serviced (among other things) by an alien creature known as Mr. Jinx. Other characters obviously join the fray over the course of the comic, such as Jupiterian princess and ambassador Jovia, engineer Holliday, and rampaging antique robot Vore. The hard sci-fi comes into play primarily in the form of FTL travel, in this case explained by switching places with a parallel universe version of themselves already at the required destination.

Rather than just stick with the concept as infalliable and useful for plot, Straub allows for the logical conclusion of such a mode of travel, even when it becomes inconvenient for the characters; especially when it becomes inconvenient for them. While a bunch of the jokes seem like jokes for the sake of a punchline, the story aspects of this comic are pretty great.

The art... eh, I'm just glad he figured out necks before he started Broodhollow.

Nice work, Mr. Straub. I look forward to acquiring the next volume in your landmark series.

9.5/10

Buy it from Kris Straub's store. 

Science Fiction - Isaac Asimov - The Stars, Like Dust (1951)

Oh shit son! Another post so soon?

So I inaugurated this blog with an Asimov review, and now I have another one for you. I explained in that previous post why I am reading these Galactic Empire novels in this order, so no QQ.

You may be able to tell up there in the title that this book was written in 1951, and god does it feel like it. I don't just mean the scientific missteps (one of which Asimov addresses in an author's note at the end) and the dated ideas like the all-important and much-forgotten "document" occasionally mentioned throughout, but there is something that really does feel like early-fifties science fiction. I get it; the tropes weren't tropes yet, and we weren't so jaded that we needed a better explanation for faster-than-light travel than "HYPERSPACE AND SCIENCE". But it's not even really gosh-wow, like the reviews all over the cover assert. There isn't really much gosh considering that the story begins on Earth (a fallout-riddled Earth at that), and the wow of space is quickly buried in the sheer amount of space travel that takes place. Even the main character, who near the beginning spends almost a whole chapter going on about the majesty of the stars, doesn't seem to really care about it later on. Space travel feels more like taking the bus the longer the story goes on.

But then again, that's Asimov for you. The longer he has to write something, the less enchanted he becomes with it himself, usually resulting in an ending that doesn't hold up to the story hooks at the beginning. This book is only 235 pages, so while the detail begins to slack, the story is all right. But that's all it is: all right.

I know someone may argue that I can't hold it up to the standards of today because it was written so long ago and that it is a "classic", but I really don't think that should preclude it from modern criticism with modern eyes. Sure, it may have been a wonder 60+ years ago, but I read it in 2013. Anyone reading this review is probably reading this book or considering it in this era. The fact of the matter is that it just doesn't hold up as well as other things from that time. That doesn't really mean that it is bad or good. It just means it doesn't have the same feeling to a modern reader that it may have had to a reader contemporary to the time.

8/10

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Young Adult - John Green - The Fault in Our Stars (2012)

I read this book today. I started it on the toilet this morning, and finished it in bed this evening. I plowed through most of it while Bryan was at the gym.

Sorry, I get ahead of things here.

I bought this book after a faulty therapy session, my first, after a very anxious morning. (I have since switched to a different therapist, who I go to see again tomorrow). I went to the bookstore to make myself feel better--not the most healthy way of dealing with my rampant emotions that day, but effective when paired with a nap. I picked this up primarily because it was on one of the bookshelf ends in the sci-fi/fantasy section. Since it was riddled with reviews and bestseller accolades from not the usual suspects for the genre, I knew it wasn't meant to attract the attention of the nerds, but rather the book skimmers who apparently don't go to bookstores to buy books for themselves, but follow someone on their way to their favorite section. I picked it up anyway. I didn't even really bother with what it was about. That's how upset I was that day.

It's now two months later, and I read this book in a day. Primarily because I really liked it.

This story is about teenagers with cancer falling in love. I know, how Lifetime-y, right? But this one is actually worth your time, especially if you like characters. Over the course of the read, you really do begin to love Hazel and Augustus (what unfortunate names!) just as they begin to love each other. When the inevitable happens, it isn't contrived and sigh-worthy as you would think, but instead heart-breaking. I didn't cry, but I came rather close several times. I didn't want Bryan to think I was a pansy or something.

The only thing I have to complain about (oh man, you should see this coming) is the Q&A and "Discussion Questions" at the back of the book. There is no reason at all for an author to explain the symbolism of passages or character names or allegories to other literature bullshit. None. Why? Why do they think that we need to be tutored on the "meanings" of their fucking book? Why can't it just be a heart-wrenching story about two unfortunate young people dealing with shortened lives together without ancient mythology getting involved to symbolize something or whatever.

I still like the story, and the characters, and the trauma you can't help but feel during the course of the novel, but you don't have to make it pretentious for it to matter.

9/10

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Fantasy - George R.R. Martin - A Feast for Crows (2005)

Obligatory haven't-posted-in-a-while blah blah blah.

I know I'm probably the last person on earth to read this installment in the landmark Song of Ice and Fire series, but I had gotten the first three books all together, so it took a while for me to get off my ass and read this one. Several years, in fact. Long enough for me to have forgotten most of the events of the previous books and be depending on the TV show to remind me of some of the shit that went down.

Without further ado, A Feast for Crows.

In the back, Mr. Martin informs us that to cut down on book size, he made an executive decision and gave us all the story for half of the characters in this book, and would do the other half later. Personally, I think that the readers would have been better served by having this information at the front of the book. Not because then readers would skip this book or whatever, but because they wouldn't have to flip through while looking for a Dany or Tyrion chapter to find this out. After all, this book is focused primarily on the southern reaches of Westeros, primarily the King's Landing machinations of the Lannisters. Cersei and Jaime are here in abundance, and their personalities and dynamism really shines in this book.

That being said, a lot of the content in this book felt like filler. I understand the need for all of it; the climax would not have worked out if we didn't have the rest of the book preceding it. But filler, no matter how tasty, is still filler. And because of that, I can't say that this is the best book in the series. Maybe A Dance with Dragons will be better.

Also, how are they going to handle that "all the story for half the characters" shit for the TV show? :/

7.5/10

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Franchise Fiction - Robin D. Laws - The Freedom Phalanx (2006)

Now this is how you write franchise fiction. My god, this one is so much better than the first one it's hard to believe.

This is another one of Bryan's books, obviously, though I was with him in the store when he got it. I think I was the one that found it on the shelf for him. :)

This particular book isn't about the original Freedom Phalanx of the first book, but instead the formation of the Phalanx in the game. All the guys on the cover are there: Manticore being a dick, Sister Psyche being the helpless girl, Statesman being from another era, Synapse being annoying, and Positron being Positron.

Where the last one fell short, this one succeeds with flying colors. Its perfect balance of action and repose works in this book, which is just as much about how the characters learn to work together and deal with their clashing personalities and opinions as much as it is a conspiracy involving food additives. Chapters actually end on cliffhangers, and each hero has a villain counterpart they have to contend with along with their own inner demons.

This one was an absolute joy to read.

There are only a couple of things I had problems with: the fact that Sister Psyche had to be the captured one because of her gender, and the fact that there was no opportunity for the reader to figure out what the bad guys' plans were on their own. I've spoken before on that last bit.

I know that in comic books, which is where this game pulls most of its inspiration, female heroes are frequently the target of kidnappings. In this case, it fits in the story to use Sister Psyche's psionic power as a battery and affect the minds of Paragon City's citizens. But it still felt like it was just a way to take the female character out of the game so the big strong manly male heroes could save the day and her without her help.

Because of that, it doesn't get a perfect score. Sorry, Mr. Laws.

9/10

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Franchise Fiction - Robert Weinberg - The Web of Arachnos (2005)

You may or may not know this, but City of Heroes was a superhero MMORPG that Bryan and I played a lot over the years. I say "was" because while we were in Seattle for PAX we heard from a friend that NCSoft was dissolving Paragon Studios, the developers who were still working on new content for the game. It's still available to play until the end of November, but we are already in mourning for our game.

So, with this new knowledge, I thought it was prudent to read the two City of Heroes novels that Bryan purchased before I got into the game back in '08. After all, very soon they were not going to be relevant anymore.

If you feel the urge to purchase this book, which is essentially the origin story of Statesman, Lord Recluse, and the Nemesis villain group, I feel it is necessary to point out to you that it's not very good. Even for franchise fiction, it's pretty bad.

It's been a few days since I finished it, so I've had some time to gain some distance from it. It hasn't truly tempered my feelings about it. The whole thing just feels like an amateur job, particularly completed by someone who doesn't do a lot of reading himself.

When you describe a person in fiction, do you give their exact heights and weights, and hope that is plenty of explanation? In case you weren't aware, the answer is no. Don't say that a girl is five feet six inches tall and weighs only one hundred three pounds (also, WHAT THE FUCK. That's not a human being. That's a skeleton.), say that she is of slightly above average height and very skinny. Let US, the audience, decide what we imagine from that.

One of the main characters, Stefan Richter, makes a big deal in the first quarter of the book about how he doesn't believe in myths and magic, he believes in logic, science, and technology. That's all well and good. The frequency in which he asserts this belief (OUT LOUD, for fuck's sake) is annoying, but considering the crazy shit they begin to find (the Well of the Furies with curative liquid and stuff), I was willing to give the author the benefit of the doubt and assume that it meant the character was trying to reassure himself in the face of this cognitive dissonance. But when we get into his head, there isn't any cognitive dissonance. Just stupid crap. And then, (spoiler!) when he turns evil, we are never given any reason why he chose that path. Just a flimsy excuse of "it's the logical way of things" is bullshit, and you know it, Mr. Weinberg.

The other superheroes that are introduced--in the later half of the book, mind you--get almost no screen time to explain their personalities and motives. Their time spent in the book is mostly where they got their powers, and then using them against baddies. Where's the characterization?

It's kind of sad when your most interesting parts are the ones that DON'T include the superpowered beings, and instead the thugs of the Prohibition era.

One last point: this book spent too much effort trying to couch the events in its pages with things that happened in real history. Statesman was not a friend of a friend of Hemingway, just so you can namedrop him. There was no need to make Arachnos part of Mussolini's cadre. Your efforts to shoehorn Mickey Mouse in were disruptive. If you are writing a book that takes place in a point of history and you want to make it relevant, don't do this. If you must associate with something to breathe life in your story, first analyze what's wrong that it needs this shit, and please try to limit it to one. This author went too far, and it did more to anger me and frustrate me as a reader than intrigue me.

3/10

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Fantasy - R. Scott Bakker - The Darkness That Comes Before (2003)

I clearly bought this book at a thrift store, but it wasn't a random pick-up like some of my brick-and-mortar store purchases tend to be. I actually had accidentally purchased the fourth book in this series because on the outside it was declared a first book, but told the truth within the covers, and I didn't notice until I was already home. When I saw the first book of this series at Deseret Industries, I had to get it. After all, used it only cost me three bucks.

Anyway.

I originally bought this author, I think, because my brother is a fan of his works. I think. I'm actually not sure. I may even be confusing this dude with someone else he likes. Either way, thick-ass fantasy novel? I'm all over it.

Or at least, I try to be.

It took me a month to read this book, and not really for length at 577 pages in this paperback version. It was simply tedious. I don't even mean boring. The whole book felt more like an info dump rather than telling a story. Thank god for the faction appendix at the end, or I wouldn't be able to keep track of all these Schools, religions, races, governments, and who is associated with what where. It was hard to even keep many of the characters' names straight, let alone who they worked for. And while I'm sure that things happened during the course of reading it, it didn't feel like anything happened at all until the second to last chapter, with the guy, with the face.

This book is about a guy who has a long-standing birthright to become the king of... somewhere? I honestly I have no idea. This is what I mean about it being hard to follow. It's also about this savage dude that hangs around him but hates him and wants to kill his father. The prince guy's dad, not his own. And they acquire a former concubine along the way. But the book is REALLY about how there is this religion that is starting a holy war to acquire a holy city back from the "heathens" that control it, and how some of the first waves of their holy war didn't work out. And also there's a wizard who takes a long time to make notes on what's going on and the prostitute that loves him.

It's really fucking convoluted, but I think it's unnecessarily so. In a book series like A Song of Ice and Fire, convoluted intrigues are important because it's not readily apparent who is in the right. In this, it's not readily apparent either, but mostly because none of these people aspire to DO anything.

Despite all of my criticism, it's not the worst fantasy novel I've ever read, but I certainly hope shit gets going in the next book or I'm going to be mad.

Also, there was no god damn reason to have an appendix that detailed the origins and roots of languages and dialects that DIDN'T EVEN MAKE IT IN THE BOOK.

6/10

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